So in retrospect, I think I have been soundly defeated by my interest in too many things.
I have always been rather well rounded in my interests. In literature I enjoy everything from Charles Dickens to Stephen King. From American classics to comic books. In music I roll with DJ Jazzy Jeff & the Fresh Prince and switch seamlessly to Wilco. From Damien Rice to They Might Be Giants. I love most things in the art world and also cheer wholeheartedly for my local sports teams. I love to watch Audrey Hepburn classics and modern Zombie movies. I play in rock bands and work at an insurance company. I love Bruce Campbell and still try to take myself seriously. I am topically conversant on a wide variety of things, but have no interest in making small talk. I play a variety of instruments, draw fairly well, enjoy writing, listen to sports radio and recently planted a vegetable garden.
I am all over the place, and I think that has been my problem.
I think my interest in so many different things has crippled my potential for success in any one particular area. I will never be a first rate musician, largely because of my inability to commit to any one instrument for an extended period of time. The grass is always greener, and all of that. I am an expert on no particular subject because I’m always moving on to the next shiny subject to catch my mind. I never could commit to a definitive, realistic career path because there are just too many dreams to follow, and in the end I have a job I have no real connection too other than financial, while never fully pursuing any of the many careers I would be interested in. It seems that by the time we know who we are it’s a little too late to do very much about it.
So far the only thing I’ve been particularly successful in is being married, which is one of those things you kind of have to commit to and can’t really be well rounded. Sorry ladies.
So... Just some thoughts. It could be that all my failures are simply because I’m not as smart or talented as I think I am. After all, we are all the stars of our own TV shows, and I’m sure I am no exception to this rule other than the fact that I like starring in your TV shows as well. But I do think there might be something to this idea. Einstein might have been slower with that whole relativity thing if he was busily monitoring who the Browns were taking in the 5th round of the draft this year or was laughing his tail off over Shaun of the Dead.
Not that I’m comparing myself to Einstein, although I do find science very interesting.
Math too.
Oh! And Literature!
And don’t forget History, Geology, and Theology.
I like them all.
A whole lot.
Blessings.
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sometimes the day begins
ReplyDeletewith nothing to look forward to
and things go from bad to worse
darkness overcomes you
nobody understands
the world is a deaf machine
without sense
or reason
sometimes you wait
and wait
and wait
and wait
but nothing ever happens
then
all your troubles come at once
wonderful things are passing you by
terrible fates are inevitable
sometimes you just don't know
what you are supposed to do
or who you are meant to be
or where you are
and the day seems to end the way it began
but suddenly
there it is right n front of you
bright and vivid
quietly waiting
just as you imagined it would be
- Shaun Tan
You are beautiful, brother.
The best people I have known are people like you. I have taken comfort in that since I tend to be a jack of all trades, too. Too many interests, too little money, you know the routine. Keep up the, um, varied and good work.
ReplyDeleteYou forgot to add "actor" to your list of talents. :-)
Ha! I should have added actor. I do still have a VHS copy of "College Girl." I never did see the other film I "acted" in. And I say "acted" in the most general terms possible.
ReplyDelete